An aphrodisiac treat goes down the drain

Central Station | Nury Vittachi 25 Sep 2019

When protester threats caused the closing of the Jockey Club race meeting in Happy Valley on Wednesday last week, chefs had a problem.

They'd ordered 5,000 oysters - and oysters are always delivered alive and cannot be frozen.

Why so many? When punters win cash, they often splash out on oysters, allegedly an aphrodisiac.

Chefs, with tears in their eyes, sadly threw all 5,000 oysters in the bin.

They should have sent them to the violent protesters with a message: "Make love, not war."

* * *

The Hong Kong government yesterday announced that it is importing an arty Danish theater drama next month about people rebuilding society after a modern day civil war.

Hey, if I want to watch people rebuilding society after a modern day civil war I just go down to Yuen Long.

* * *

Good news. Some things are returning to normal. Topsports, the firm representing Nike in China, yesterday defied the negative atmosphere in Hong Kong and had a successful stock market launch. Someone must have said: "Just do it."

* * *

More good news. The maker of Budweiser beer said it will go ahead with a Hong Kong stock market launch next week. I'll drink to that.

As long as the drink isn't Budweiser.

* * *

A humble team of government workers will today start hanging banners and bunting (flags on string) from lampposts around Hong Kong.

This is a perfectly normal end-of-September activity to mark our country's National Day on October 1.

But I bet they're nervous this year. Protesters have responded violently to posters referring to that date.

One building in Wan Chai has no less than nine giant Chinese flags - but as the picture shows, they are on a long, thin, video screen on the roof, too high for any petrol bomb to reach.

* * *

This week's "Pravda Award" for astonishingly biased reporting goes to (drum roll please) Amnesty International. The British organization made headlines all over the world this week with a "survey" showing the terrible things that evil Hong Kong society does to anyone who wants to speak out.

Except it was rubbish. How many people were surveyed? Fifty-four. Not 54,000 or 5,400 or even 540. Just 54.

There were more people on my bus last night.

I wonder if the Amnesty people even left their offices?

* * *

A Hong Kong man boarded an MTR train at Central Station yesterday.

How is that news?

Because it happened 8,000 kilometers away from this city.

On a visit to Sweden this week, Hong Kong treasury minister James Lau found the capital city's transit system remarkably familiar.

It was set up by Hong Kong's MTR people, is called MTR Express and goes to a place in Stockholm called Central Station.

There are differences, though. Trains have names, and one is called Trainy McTrainface.

Oh, and their MTR doesn't have masked men smashing up ticket machines.

* * *

More than 4,000 Swedish people have silicone chips in their hands which they can use as Octopus-style tickets on some trains. But MTR bosses say they prefer that passengers do not insert their Octopus cards into their bodies.

Probably wise.

On the other hand, if MTR turnstiles had the technology to detect internalized tickets, it could help solve the present problems of fare dodgers who leap over gates. "Over you go!" Beeeep! "Oh bother."

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