Dwellers at new city hotspot unmoooved

Central Station | Nury Vittachi 2 Nov 2018

Abandon Hong Kong Island! It's no longer cool. The city's energy center is moving to a different island.

First, Henry Cheng Kar-shun is building the city's largest, swankiest shopping mall-and-hotel complex-and it's on Lantau.

Second, look at a map and you can see that the famous new sea bridge from China is in truth the Zhuhai-Macau-LANTAU bridge.

Third, Carrie Lam Cheng Yuet-Ngor's planned new super-island will be a long way from Hong Kong Island - but will be part of Lantau.

My Lantau friends (even the anarchic ones with long hair and body hygiene issues) are secretly proud.

But how will all this activity affect the rural island's most loyal residents, several hundred cows and buffalos?

"They sometimes look over at all the building work being done and moo a bit, but generally they are pretty chill about it," said one of my classier friends, teacher Edith Cho. "I don't foresee protests."

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This is in marked contrast to what happens on Hong Kong Island, where everything the government does is met with fury. ("Carrie Lam strokes puppy: Thousands march against government-animal collusion.")

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We need a name for Lam's new metropolis.

1) City-In-The-Sea? Or, after sea rises, City-Partly-Under-The-Sea?

2) Lamia, so that it incorporates our esteemed leader's surname and matches Lamma and Lantau?

3) Atlantis? Because it may all just be a fantasy?

4) Or perhaps we should turn Lam's first name into a place name.

Carrisyia? Carrivia? The Carripines? The Carribea? How about the Undemocratic Republic of Carrilamistan?

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A colleague notes that the background music in the video to promote the new island is Amazing Grace. Given warnings by environmentalists it might not survive climate change, the lyrics are ominous: "The earth shall soon dissolve like snow."

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The main ferry terminal in Macau was deserted yesterday. Reader Stephen Durie, a priest, said: "It's almost heaven."

All the travellers were using the new mega-bridge across the sea. Bridge buses can cost as little as HK$20, compared to HK$200 on a ferry.

Hopefully thousands of Hong Kong people will bypass Macau's famous "sindustries" and flock to the lovely 200-year-old chapel that the Reverend Stephen Durie runs in Macau.

But probably not.

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Our mention of the Quite Good Chinese Restaurant inspired reader Semirah Darwin to point out that there's a Very Good Chinese Banquet Hall in Hang Hau. All we need is an eatery called Seriously Bad Chinese Canteen and we'll have the full range.

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Reader Collin Williams spotted a tech firm called Takki in Hong Kong. This sounds like "tacky," which unfortunately means "poor quality" in English.

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Top speaker at the construction industry conference at Hong Kong Science Park in December is Dr Johann Plank, I heard yesterday from reader Mary Lee. Clearly born for the job.

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On a related theme, I was sorry to hear from reader and pop fan Simon Chu that Frank Beard, famous for being the only member of the rock group ZZ Top without a beard, has stopped shaving.

I wonder if Don Black is still a white supremacist?

We used to have a photographer of nudes whose name was Pubic Ha.

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Have a great weekend - this column will appear again on Tuesday.

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